It’s 2013. As the custom goes, here’s wishing you a very Happy New Year!
This last four weeks has been something of a roller coaster for me. I have been almost exclusively spending time with my beautiful mama. No art. No writing. No planning. No studying – but lots of learning. High drama, deep despair, tears and sadness, laughter and song – it’s all been there.
The gift of angels
Mum is coming to the end of her life, but she’s not ready to leave quickly. She is highly incapacitated, but didn’t want to end up in a hospice and so we are taking care of her in her own home. I’m with her every day and have formed the second half of a tag team with her husband, my step-dad. But it’s only possible with the help of the local District Nurse team and the angels that are the Marie Curie nurses.
The Marie Curie nurses have made this journey a whole lot bearable for us all. I’m now sleeping in my own bed each night and my step-dad is managing much more sleep at home. They can’t visit us every night – but each night they do – well, it helps us cope better with each new day.
I’ve had an idea about how I wish to support the Marie Curie organisation this year. More on that later.
Peak of the Week
Meantime, the peak of the last four weeks is really that I have been able to spend so much sacred time with my mama. Each time I enter her house, I am filled with such a sense of peace and love. There won’t ever be a time like it again. For this opportunity, I am truly blessed and grateful beyond words.
Connections and Community
There hasn’t been much opportunity for any connections outwith family this last while. Though I am enormously grateful for all the personal messages of support I’ve received, particularly over email. It has meant a great deal, although I haven’t yet found the time to thank everyone individually.
One particular message made me cry and laugh and recognise just how valuable our online connectedness is, especially in the midst of tough times.
It was from Shannon – and it came via video. Virtual hug back atcha!
Celebrations amongst Darkness
We’re not sure what each day will bring, so the planning of celebrations is both difficult to undertake and so far down our priorities (sleep, sleep, sleep!) that to reach Hogmanay (New Year’s Eve) came as somewhat of a surprise to us.
Traditionally a time of much singing and dancing (and a few drams) here in the Scotland that is Bonnie, we were saddened to see it pass without any acknowledgement. So, we asked the teenager to invite some of his dram fam to ours, we got the guitars out and had a wee singalong. Thanks to Matthew for his photos of the evening and to Iona, Laura and Anna for joining in.
Nobody flinched when I suggested a releasing ceremony before the Bells (midnight) and an intentions setting ceremony afterwards.
So there you have it. That’s the peak of the week. A most strange time, indeed.
There will be the first in a new series of posts this coming Friday. I auto-scheduled a few just the day before Mama took ill. But otherwise, I’m still in caring mode. Exhausted, but thankful for every day on this planet. Remember, it’s only temporary – do make the most of it!